Babylon Bee on Hurricane Ian.
Authorities Warn That Hurricane Could Cause Florida To Have As Many Water And Power Shortages As California
“We’re preparing the way we always do,” said local Florida man Buggs Crullers. “By stocking up on enough beer, cigarettes, and lotto tickets to last us a couple of weeks! If it gets as bad as a normal day in Cali, we’ll be ready!”
I miss being in Florida by one Interstate exit. I am in Ian’s projected path. And I saw this shortly after returning from the convenience store.
Where I’d gone to actually pick up a lottery ticket for me and my sister.
Why not? I’ve got gas. I’ve got food, water, alternate sanitation, backup power, multiple ways to cook, flashlights, batteries…
That’s just normal ’round here. My sister always laughs when she sees something about city folk having maybe three days worth of food before they begin starving. SO what was left to pick up? You can’t exactly stockpile weekly lottery tickets.
Well, you could. But the expire right quick, and wouldn’t even make acceptable toilet paper. (Yeah, got that, too.)
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