“Madame Butterfly’s Massage Parlor”

As seen at Knuckledraggin’.

True story: Slow day. The phone rang, and I answered it.

“Pizza Shack. Can I take your order?”

“Wha… ” Caller sputtering, hangs up. Phone rings again.

“Madame Butterfly’s Massage Parlor. How may we service you”

Immediate disconnect.

No big deal, right. But the funny part is that this was on deployment in theater for Desert Shield/Storm. The calls were on a crypto phone on a closed, dedicated military net, not the public switched telephone network. USCENTAF in Saudi Arabia was calling.

Anyway, the phone rang again, and I answered it properly. The guy on the other end started telling me about the weird wrong numbers he was getting.

Some folks are slow on the uptake. And yes, I have always been a smartass.

 

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[Update]Halyna Hutchins Medical Examiner’s Report

Update: Got it. Had it, didn’t realize it.


Media reporting on just what that report actually says is inconsistent and vague. And no one seems to be linking to the report itself. I have a couple of request filed, but official channels hate to cooperate with little folk like me.

If anyone has a link to the report — the official report, not media take our word for it, this is what it says — I’d appreciate a copy.

Thanks.

 

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English Is Hard

Saw this at Peter Grant’s site.

Many years ago I was stationed in Turkey. There was a Turkish Asker (soldier) who usually worked as an orderly in the Turkish commander’s office. I think his name was Ahmet. That office adjoined mine, so the soldier was often in my office, bringing us tea and chatting. He was working on his English.

He spoke English passably — certainly far better than my mangled Turkish — but he wanted to read English, too. But there was a little problem vowels, and he asked for my help.

I began with the simple “A.”

Long and short vowels. “Cat” versus “cake”. He thought it was silly for one letter to have two different sounds, but he could deal with it. So…

“Father.” Say what? But I explained that it gets better.

I wrote out “boat.” Yeah, the “A” is silent.

“But how do you know which sound?”

“Guess.”

We proceeded to “E,” and it went as you’d expect.

“O?” Long, short…

Double-O “oo.”  Boot. Remarkably like “U.” Except if it’s “but.”

“Now let’s talk about “Y.”

I have no idea if he ever mastered written American English.

 

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Arrests; Or It Didn’t Happen

The feds claim someone threatened to set off a dirty bomb at FBI headquarters. Oddly enough, they didn’t announce any arrests for that crime.

FBI bulletin warns of ‘dirty bomb’ threat and increasing calls for ‘civil war’ in wake of Mar-a-Lago raid – while former agent and GOP Rep. Brian Fitzpatrick says agency warned him that his ‘life was in danger’ due to threats from Trump supporters
The FBI has warned of a dirty bomb threat and increasing calls for civil war after agents raided Donald Trump’s Mar-a-Lago estate.

The Bureau said in a leaked memo they had received an uptick in violent threats on social media following the morning search last week.

The chilling note revealed thugs planned to put a dirty bomb in front of the agency’s headquarters amid a suggested ‘armed rebellion’.

18 U.S. Code § 2332a – Use of weapons of mass destruction:

(a)Offense Against a National of the United States or Within the United States.—A person who, without lawful authority, uses, threatens, or attempts or conspires to use, a weapon of mass destruction—
[…]
shall be imprisoned for any term of years or for life, and if death results, shall be punished by death or imprisoned for any term of years or for life.

As for the alleged “threats” against Fitzpatrick…

That’s a crime, too. Where’s the arrest? Or did someone just say mean things about you, Fitzpatrick? Damn that darned First Amendment, eh?

Funny thing; this is the first I’ve heard of any such threat. Granted, I don’t hang out at the seriously whacked out forums myself, but you’d think someone would have tipped me off about the potential fed agent provocateurs.

I would like to see the ratio of feddie agents and CIs to low-hanging fruit at some of those forums.

 

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Temperature Reporting BS

I’ve noticed an interesting trend in weather reporting for the past few weeks, ever since the media started pushing the “heat wave” crap.

Here are temperatures being reported in my area. Those are private weather stations. Most of them used to be in fairly close agreement with temps at my place. (An exception being an Osprey Cove — yankee-transplant ghetto — station that seems to be positioned beside an AC unit.)

I say “used to.” Currently my two thermometers — an alcohol type, and a bimetallic strip dial type — both say the current temperature is 83 degrees Fahrenheit.

The lowest area temp reported by Weather Underground is 87.8. Everything else is in the nineties. We never went above 85 today; it’s been mostly overcast. I think my local temp only made it to the nineties one day this month; it’s been unusually cool lately.

Has anyone else noticed any discrepancies between the temp you see versus what gets reported online?

 

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Mid-Terms Are Coming! Get That ChinCOVID Case Count Up!

Gotta panic the sheeple into letting Dims cheat again after all. So just keep taking COVID tests until you pop positive. Especially if you domn’t have any symptoms of ChinCOVID.

FDA: Take 3 Home Tests If Exposed to COVID to Boost Accuracy
If you were exposed to COVID-19, take three home tests instead of two to make sure you’re not infected, according to new U.S. recommendations released Thursday.

Previously, the Food and Drug Administration had advised taking two rapid antigen tests over two or three days to rule out infection. But the agency says new studies suggest that protocol can miss too many infections, and could result in people spreading the coronavirus to others, especially if they don’t develop symptoms.

I’m so old that I remember back in ’19, when “case” meant you did develop symptoms of an illness.

Even with ChinCOVID, one test in the morning before school was sufficient to prove you didn’t have an illness for which you didn’t have symptoms. Then it was two tests (because most of the RATs are a 50:50 shot).

Now it’s three tests.

At this rate, by the end of October, with mid-terms looming, they’ll be screeching for endless tests, quadruple masking, and 6 foot social distancing just to fill out a mandatory mail-in ballot.

It won’t do much for health, but it’ll sure boost the test manufacturers’ bottom lines. And help the Dims “find” more mystery mail-ins.

 

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Mar-A-Lago Warrant: Does anything reek more of “swamp”?

Here’s thh warrant; sealed, naturally, as expected.

But really…

The warrant was signed by magistrate judge Bruce Reinhart, who… well…

Jeffrey Epstein also hired Bruce Reinhart, then an assistant U.S. attorney in South Florida, now a U.S. magistrate. He left the U.S. Attorney’s Office (which was prosecuting Epstein) on Jan. 1, 2008, and went to work representing Epstein’s employees on Jan. 2, 2008, court records show. In 2011, Reinhart was named in the Crime Victims’ Rights Act lawsuit, which accused him of violating Justice Department policies by switching sides, implying that he leveraged inside information about Epstein’s investigation to curry favor with Epstein.

And despite that oddity, somehow he’s back as a federal magistrate.

 

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I Want To See The Warrant And Affidavit

RE: The Mar-A-Lago raid last night.

To the best of my knowledge (and few reports this morning claim the same), no other former President in American history has had his home raided and searched, allegedly for documents from his official tenure as President.

It’s kind of a big deal. So I was a bit surprised at how few reports even mentioned a warrant for the search. That’s shifting this morning, as some outlets seem to remember that there is supposed to be one.

But no one seems to have seen one. Not surprising; I’d expect it to be sealed, if only to cover the asses of the judge and warrant requester(s).

I have never been a Trump fan.* His only redeeming qualities are that he’s entertaining and that he drives Dimocrats nuts.

But being an anti-Second Amendment asshole isn’t grounds for a completely unprecedented armed raid on a former President’s home. In an investigation in which has been cooperating already.

I’m not a Republican. I don’t like Trump. But even I can’t convince myself that this is anything but a political attack.

I’ve seen multiple comparison to J. Edgar Hoover’s political FBI. I think that’s a bit unfair.

Hoover would be green with envy.

Show me the warrant, prove me wrong.


* For example…
Trump’s past on RKBA
HERE’S WHAT THE NRA JUST ENDORSED FOR PRESIDENT
I’m not a Trump supporter…”
NO-BUY TERRORIST WATCH LISTS: BUGS VS. FEATURES
Trump announces he will not run for a second term
If the Democrats really wanted to impeach Trump

More and more and more.

 

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You’ve Been Shot

So what do you do? Call 911? Rush to the nearest hospital on your own?* Of course not.

Welcome to 21st century America.

Williams was shot twice but was able to get into his car and drive away. He Facetimed his best friend and the friend’s girlfriend, who were still at the party, as he circled the block. He told them he had been shot, and they both noticed blood on his shirt near his stomach and side.

Sure. Circle the block a few times while Facetiming your bros. Maybe do a quick Instagram video that might go viral.

WTF?


* Yeah; my regular readers are likely to pull put a trauma kit and start by trying to plug holes. We are the ones who may survive the next few years.

 

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Walmart Midwits?

Aesop, over at Raconteur Report has a tale of woe regarding what he calls a “midwit employee” at Walmart unable to ring up a book. Things are not always what they seem.

Confession: In a desperate period I worked at a Walmart. So I have a little insider info on store ops.

Two things to understand. One is that Walmart assumes all employees below the level of department managers are brain-dead meat robots even if proven otherwise. And two, they actively discourage anything resembling initiative.

Aesop wanted to buy a clearance book. It had clearance price sticker, but the sticker wasn’t recognized by the register system. Aesop thinks the cashier was a frickin’ idiot unable to figure out how to input a price.

But here’s a secret. That situation called for an override code to be entered into the register. Almost no one below department manager has the override code. When this happens, it’s full stop, and hope you can get a manager to show up sometime before shift change. Continue reading Walmart Midwits?